Episode 10 - The Secret Life of the American Teenager

Thanks for stopping by our blog! You can read about previous episodes of "The Secret Life of the American Teenager" by clicking the label "Media" here or at the end of this post. You can watch some of the episodes online here (click the tab called "Full Episode"). Here are a few points from Episode 10, with some items to discuss with your teens.

Amy is apparently going to a new school, and her dad asks, "Amy, do you really want to go to school with a bunch of sluts?" Amy replies, "If you're calling them a slut, you're calling me a slut." Ashley notes that "You're only a slut for the two and a half minutes." Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a slut as a promiscuous woman, and defines promiscuous (in this context) as having had more than one sexual partner. So Amy is clearly not a slut - she's only had one sexual partner thus far (that we know of). And Ashley's comment doesn't seem right either...being promiscuous isn't a temporary situation, applying only during the time of sex.

There are a lot of slang terms and names that people can be called. You know that kids can be especially cruel to each other by calling names. And new terms are being invented all the time. I remember in 9th grade when someone called my mother a "M.F." to her face, actually using the initials not the full words. She didn't know what it meant. Are you a little out of the loop on current insults? Taking one topic at a time, talk to your kids about the names that people at their school would call them if they were pregnant, had bad grades, had good grades, didn't wear fashionable clothes, etc. Ask them what each term is supposed to mean or imply (in other words, why is it an insult?). Then, with your kids, look up the meanings of these words in a dictionary. Are the implied meanings accurate, or have the true meanings of the words been corrupted? For example, as discussed above, Amy can't yet be called a slut because she's only had one sexual partner. Ask your kids if the insult can be applied equally to boys and girls. For example, would a boy ever be called a slut? If not, what is the insult term for a promiscuous boy? If there isn't one, talk about this double standard.

When people call others names, they are often trying to make themselves feel superior by putting others down. This name calling is actually verbal abuse and bullying. Read this article about name calling and how to handle it in your own home. Examine the ways you talk to your own kids...do you use negative labels and names when you talk to them? As we see in this episode, Amy is right that when her dad labels a group (pregnant girls) negatively he is also labeling her negatively.

Later in the show, Adrian's mom tells Adrian that she got pregnant on purpose so that someone would love her. This idea is one of the reason that some teens get pregnant too. After Henry and Alice have sex, Alice says "I thought we would feel like we were in love if we just had sex." Talk to your kids about the realities of what love feels like and acts like. How can they tell the difference between lust, infatuation, and love?

The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy also has a discussion guide for episode 10 (pdf).

We blogged about each episode in season one: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven.