Episode 7 - The Secret Life of the American Teenager

Thanks for stopping by our blog! You can read about previous episodes of "The Secret Life of the American Teenager" by clicking the label "Media" here or at the end of this post. You can watch some of the episodes online here (click the tab called "Full Episode"). Here are a few points from Episode 7, with some items to discuss with your teens.

Amy is talking to her mom about leaving to live with grandmother during her pregnancy. Amy says she doesn't want anyone to see her pregnant, even her family. Amy says she wants to do this all by herself, and her mom would prefer to be there with her and see her every day. Talk to your daughter about how's she's feeling as people start to discover that she's pregnant. You may find it helpful to read the chapter "Trying to hide" in our book "How To Survive Your Teen's Pregnancy."

Amy's dad comes home to talk to Amy and says, "I should have talked to you more about personal things like where babies come from." The other day we posted about books that can help you talk to your children about sex.

Amy's dad says, "These things happen, mainly when guys talk young girls into doing things they shouldn't." Amy says, "It's not all his fault. I just let it happen." Her dad replies, "No, its his fault. He knew what he was doing." If your teen daughter is pregnant, was she taken advantage of by an older boy?

Amy's dad asks Amy if Ricky knows about the baby, and has she talked to him. Amy replies that she hasn't talked to him face-to-face and that she doesn't want anything to do with him. Her dad remarks, "Too late for that." Ricky is having a similar talk with his foster parents. He tells them he hasn't talked to Amy, that he doesn't want to talk to her, and that he doesn't want anything to do with her. His foster dad also notes, "You've already had something to do with her, son." Ricky reminds his foster dad that he isn't his father, and the foster dad replies, "I'm not your father, but I've tried to be a good father. Now you're going to be a dad. What kind of father will you be? It's time to have a conversation. Go talk to her." If your daughter is pregnant, have you met with the family of the baby's father? Has your daughter's partner abandoned her now that she is pregnant?

Amy's dad asks her what will happen after the baby is born, and Amy says she doesn't know and that she doesn't want to think about it now. While nine months of pregnancy can seem like a long time, it may pass faster than you expect, especially if the baby is born early. There are so many things to learn about and think about, that you really cannot delay for too long. Spend a little time each day learning about a relevant topic such as nutrition, fetal development, pregnancy, adoption, parenting skills, or decision making skills.

Ricky says Amy couldn't possibly come to school and have a baby and asks his foster mom if she can do something about that. She replies, "I encourage teenage mothers to stay in school." She encourages Ricky to take responsibility for this baby. He replies, "I'm not exactly the responsible type and neither is she - thus the baby."

Ben is talking to his dad about Amy wanting to leave town and not see him. Ben's dad replies, "She scared. She's scared, she's angry, and she's overwhelmed." Ben's dad tells Ben to go along with Amy's plan and to recognize that her plan will change many times. Talk to your pregnant daughter about what she is feeling. If she is scared, is she able to list all the things that worry her? Is she angry? If so, can she list the people she's angry at and why she's angry at them? You may find it helpful to read the chapter "What is my daughter feeling?" in our book "How To Survive Your Teen's Pregnancy."

Amy & Ashley are talking about how Amy wants to be a normal teen and have a baby much later in life, after school & marriage. Ashley asks, "Then why did you have sex?" Amy replies, "I don't know. I didn't think about it. I didn't have a reason, I kinda just did it." Amy asks Ashley to promise not to have sex until she's married, but Ashley responds that she has condoms instead. Talk to your other children about how they are feeling with a pregnant sister. Are they embarrassed? How does their sister's pregnancy make them feel about sex outside marriage?

Amazingly (but who didn't see it coming?) Ricky and Amy's dad end up at Adrian's apartment. They talk. Amy's dad is angry at Ricky, but explains why he wants to talk instead of killing Ricky. Amy's dad then tells Ricky that Ricky is to have no part of Amy's decision making process at all. Amy's dad says that Ricky will go along with whatever Amy and her parents decide, and that if Amy choose adoption then Ricky will sign the papers releasing his child. Further, if Amy chooses to parent the child, then Ricky will pay support but have no parental rights because that's his punishment for taking advantage of an innocent 15 year old girl. Ricky agrees to this for the moment, but later talks to Amy and says he would like to be kept informed about her decisions at the minimum. Talk to your pregnant daughter about what involvement she would like from the baby's father. You may find it helpful to read the chapters "Where does the baby's father belong in all this?", "Should she parent alone?", "Should we adopt the baby?", and "Should she make an adoption plan?" in our book "How To Survive Your Teen's Pregnancy."

The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy also has a discussion guide for episode 7(pdf).

We blogged about each episode in season one: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven.