Real Stories: Michael Rice, Father and Student

Watch this video of Michael Rice, father of two children and a student at Ivy Tech Community College in Indiana.  He talks about being a parent and a student, and how his priorities had to change.



Talk to your pregnant daughter about some of Michael's points:

• The responsibilities that come with being a parent mean that you have to increase the amount of work you do to be successful as a student.  He talks about how he used to just wake up and dress himself, but now as a parent he has to get the children ready for the day and then deliver them to childcare or school before he can start his own day. Then, after school, he has to get the children fed and spend time with them before he can start his own homework.  With your pregnant daughter, write out a detailed schedule of a typical day for after her child is born.  What time will she need to wake up in order to take care of her baby before heading off to school or her job?  When will she be able to study?  Would an adoption plan help her accomplish her educational goals?
• Michael says that he does not regret having children, and that being a parent made him reset his priorities.  He says that children go to the top of his priority list and everything else gets bumped down.  With your pregnant daughter, write a list of her priorities before she became pregnant.  Then write a list of her current priorities as a pregnant woman.  Then write a list of her expected priorities after her child is born.  Talk about the changes that have occurred and will occur in her priorities.  How does she feel about these changes?  What ideas can you both brainstorm to help make the transitions easier?
• Michael says that part of being a parent is establishing a firm foundation for the children: medically, financially, and how you want them raised.  Talk to your pregnant daughter about these areas.  What foundation will she be able to give them medically, financially, and in how she plans to parent?  Would an adoption plan give her child a firmer foundation than she is able to provide?
• Finally, Michael says "Your life is not over because you become a parent.  You just might have to work a little harder than you would have, and be a lot more focused, but it's not impossible."  Ask your pregnant daughter how she feels about this quote.  Is she feeling overwhelmed?  How can she break the tasks ahead of her into more manageable tasks?  

You may find it helpful to read the chapters "Completing School" and “Should she make an adoption plan?” in our book “How To Survive Your Teen’s Pregnancy“.

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