Is your pregnant daughter safe?

News from Italy on May 14 tells of a 14-year-old possibly pregnant girl (autopsy not finished at time of this post) who was murdered by the three boys who might have been the father of the baby. The boy's were afraid she would tell people that one of them was the father. So they killed her.

Also 14-years-old, Chelsea Brooks of Kansas (9 months pregnant) was murdered by a hit man hired by the father of the baby. That trial will start soon.

This ABC News story from 2005 discusses "Why Pregnant Women Are Targeted", and cites two horrible statistics:

A study published in the March 2005 edition of the American Journal of Public Health found that homicide was a leading cause of death among pregnant women in the United States between 1991 and 1999.

A 2001 study published by the Journal of the American Medical Association said 20 percent of Maryland women who died during pregnancy were murdered. Researchers found the same trend in New York from 1987-1991 and in the Chicago area from 1986-1989. According to the CDC, approximately 324,000 pregnant women are hurt by an intimate partner or former partner each year.

Why do men kill their pregnant partners? "The usual reason when it involves a man is the [unborn] baby. The baby is causing a complication in his life," said Pat Brown, profiler and chief executive officer of The Pat Brown Criminal Profiling Agency."

Consider talking to the father of your daughter's baby (and his family, if possible). Does he see the baby as "obstacle to the life he wants to lead, a burden, a lifelong obligation of child support"? If so, consider your daughter's physical safety. The article mentions that if the baby's father is trying to control your daughter, that this is a warning sign to keep in mind. Another ABC News story adds to this line of thought:

Despite the various motives, experts say all these killings have a common denominator: a need for control. Pregnancy can make domineering husbands and
boyfriends feel like they are no longer powerful and in control, especially in abusive relationships. Murder is the ultimate demonstration of control. "What we find with men who are violent toward their intimate partner is that he feels that he's lost control or possession over her or her body," said Cates. "He feels that he is not getting the attention that he deserves. He often feels … that he's lost his place to the baby."

Other reasons the father's baby may try to hurt your daughter include:

• He wants her to get an abortion, and she refuses
• He wants to keep the pregnancy secret
• He doesn't want to pay child support

Ask your daughter to be honest with you: Has her partner been abusing her verbally or physically? If so, get her the counseling and medical treatment she needs, and figure out what steps you need to take to keep her safe from the baby's father.