Uprooting Bitterness

An article in the September/October 1996 issue of Virtue Magazine was titled "Uprooting Bitterness". The article is by Nancy Carmichael, and it has some wonderful tidbits that are relevant to the Christian parents of a pregnant single.

"[Bitterness] comes from justice denied, a hope dashed, an expectation unmet, a belief that I deserved better than what I received, anger grown cold and unresolved - maybe from an offense at the hands of someone I love."

Do you feel this way regarding your daughter's pregnancy outside of marriage?
What hopes of yours were dashed when you discovered her pregnancy?
What expectations of your daughter were not met by this change in her life?
How about your spouse...what hopes and expectations were changed?
How about your pregnant daughter...what hopes of hers were dashed by this child's creation? What expectations of her own were changed?

"It's nasty stuff that easily takes root. It prods me to stew: 'He should have known better.' 'She needs to make restitution for this.' Or 'God could have prevented this from happening. And He didn't.' "

What thoughts have been stewing in your mind and heart regarding your daughter? Or the baby's father? Or God?

"It lures me to flog myself mentally for past mistakes, or the unrighteous people in our nation, thinking in some twisted way I'm doing God a favor by being mad at sinners."

Do you identify with this?

"How do I let go of offenses, the deeply rooted things that slowly but surely sap life from me?"

Ms Carmichael quotes Walter Brueggemann from "Finally Comes The Poet" when he says, "Keeping kills. Relinquishing heals... Return to the command, to the God who rests and gives rest, who sets free and satisfies. We do not yield easily. But if we do not yield, we shall die." The article also quotes an anonymous source that says, "Forgiveness is celestial amnesia; that is, letting go of all the memories of the past except the love we have given and received."

Will you take the effort to yield to the God who gives rest? Will you let Him set you free and satisfy you? Will you let Him help you focus on the love for your daughter and her child?