Teen Marriage

Pregnancy and teen marriage is in the news again as we hear that Bristol Palin and Levi Johnson have ended their engagement.

The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy released a press statement in response. This press statement appears to quote research, but fails to give the sources for the "facts" listed. So they may be true, but there's no way to verify them.

• At the time of their child's birth, more than half of unmarried teen mothers say they are either "certain" or chances are "good" they will marry the biological father of their child. However, 8 out of 10 fathers don't ever marry the teen mother of their child. According to this, 2 out of 10 fathers do indeed marry the teen mother of their child. Since we don't know how many mothers "more than half" is, we still know that not all teen mothers were expecting to marry the father of their baby.
• Despite high expectations for marriage, fewer than 8% of teen mothers marry their baby's father within one year of the birth of their child. It would be interesting to know whether this percentage increases with time. For example, how many teen mothers marry their baby's father within 2 years? or 5 years? What percentage of teen mothers married the baby's father BEFORE the birth of the child?
• Teenagers who have a non-marital birth are also significantly less likely to be married by the age of 35 than those who do not have babies as teens. Wow, we have to go a long way out to get to age 35. How many teens with a non-marital birth are married by the age of 25? or 30?
• It is also the case that most single mothers of all ages who have a child as a result of an unplanned pregnancy remain single and most cohabiting mothers either continue cohabiting or break up with their partner. How many is "most"?? Is that 51%? 99%? Somewhere in between? This type of statistic is practically useless.

Should marriage be encouraged for all teen mothers? Absolutely not. If the father of the baby is not a good person, they should absolutely not get married. If the father of the baby would have made a good husband when there was no pregnancy, then the couple should indeed carefully consider getting married.

Are teen marriages guaranteed to fail? Absolutely not! We wrote about this topic before, but here's some of that material again.

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, National Center for Health Statistics released a report in December 2005 which was called "Fertility, Family Planning, and Reproductive Health of U.S. Women: Data from the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth."

This statistical report from the government says that for people who marry under the age of 18, that 93% of those marriages are still intact one year later, that 76% are still going 3 years later, that 65% are still working 5 years later, and that 52% are still married after 10 years!

For teens aged 18-19 who get married, 90% are still married a year later, 80% are still married 3 years later, 72% are still married 5 years later, and 61% are still married after 10 years!

So teen marriages are by no means guaranteed to fail.

Even if a teen marriage ends in divorce, "marrying before the birth of a child may lead to greater paternal support, even if the marriage doesn't last. If couples marry, the male partner is likely to be a resident parent and have greater access to the child. Even if the couple eventually divorces, this early contact may lead to greater levels of financial support from the father." (Naomi Seiler, "Is Teen Marriage A Solution?" April 2002. Center for Law and Social Policy.)

ANY marriage, at ANY age needs the same thing: the physical, emotional, and spiritual support of their families. ANY person who marries at ANY age needs to be a responsible, safe partner. This applies to the woman and the man equally. The BOTH must be responsible and safe people.

Find a counselor or church that offers pre-marital evaluation and counseling. Have your pregnant daughter and the baby's father take the personality and compatibility exams that are available. If they have scores that suggest that there is a possibility of a good relationship, then do futher counseling and exploring of the topic of marriage. You may find it helpful to read the chapters "Should they marry?" and "Teen marriage success" from our book "How to Survive Your Teen's Pregnancy".